Family Trauma & Cycles
You don’t have to repeat the patterns you were handed.
Sometimes the hardest wounds to name are the ones passed down quietly—generation to generation. If you grew up walking on eggshells, feeling like your needs were too much, or carrying emotional burdens that weren’t yours to hold, this section is for you. Here, we’ll explore the impact of family dynamics, inherited trauma, and how to break painful cycles with compassion.
You’re not broken—you’re carrying a story that deserves to be seen.
I Have to Fix It — The Lie Trauma Taught You Control Equals Safety
Many trauma survivors develop an automatic urge to fix, manage, or prevent problems before they happen. This isn’t a flaw or personality trait — it’s a nervous system adaptation shaped by environments where safety wasn’t guaranteed. This post explores why control can feel like safety, how fixing becomes exhausting, and how trauma-informed EMDR therapy in Phoenix helps the body learn it no longer has to carry everything alone.
I’m Too Much — The Lie Trauma Taught You to Shrink to Stay Loved
Feeling like you’re “too much” isn’t a personality flaw, it’s often a trauma response shaped by environments where emotional expression didn’t feel safe. This trauma-informed exploration looks at why shrinking becomes a survival strategy and how EMDR therapy helps the nervous system unlearn the belief that taking up space is dangerous.
I Have to Keep Everyone Happy - The Lie Trauma Taught You Love Is Earned
You didn’t learn to keep everyone happy because you’re weak or codependent. You learned it because, at one point, it helped you stay safe, connected, and loved. This post explores how people-pleasing is a trauma response rooted in the nervous system—and how EMDR Therapy in Phoenix can help your body unlearn the belief that love has to be earned.
The Lies Trauma Taught You: How Survival Roles Shape the Way We Show Up in the World
Trauma often teaches us to survive by playing roles — the peacemaker, the fixer, or the quiet one. These patterns once kept us safe, but now they lead to burnout, anxiety, and disconnection. In this three-part series, trauma therapist Kandace Ledergerber, LPC/LMHC, explores how EMDR Therapy in Phoenix and Tempe helps you unlearn these roles, rebuild safety in your body, and reconnect with your authentic self.
Boundaries for Trauma Survivors: A Step-by-Step Guide to Feeling Safe While Setting Limits
Boundaries can feel impossible for trauma survivors, but they’re essential for healing. If saying "no" makes your heart race or guilt creeps in, you’re not alone. Trauma often wires us to prioritize others over ourselves—but you can rewrite that pattern. This guide walks you through why boundaries feel so hard, how to set them step by step, and ways to regulate through the discomfort. Because you deserve relationships that feel safe and sustainable.
Re-Defining Trauma: Understanding the Impact and How EMDR Therapy Phoenix Can Help
This Podcast and Blog article are all about Re-Defining Trauma from its traditional meaning, embracing what it means for the person who experienced it, and how EMDR therapy can help.
How Experiencing Gaslighting As A Child Impacts An Adult
The term gaslighting has gained a lot of awareness in recent years. This blog covers what gaslighting is, examples of what gaslighting might look like from caregiver to child, the impact it can have on the adult self, and what to do about it. If you are looking for EMDR therapy in Tampa to help you heal from gaslighting or other trauma, please reach out for a free 15-minute consultation.
When Trauma Becomes The Norm - It’s Still Traumatizing
My name is Kandace Ledergerber, I am an LMHC and Registered Yoga Teacher in Tampa Florida providing EMDR therapy. With the recent trauma of the shooting in Uvalde Texas, I wanted to take a moment this week to pause and validate some of the many emotions that are coming up for people.